Beware of things labeled "old fashioned". They're NOT!

Big Day #1 has come and gone, and Big Day #2 (chronologically speaking) is still nearly a month away. I think by then I will have recovered from the trauma of eating "old fashioned cornbread dressing" from....well, in the spirit of the season I won't embarrass them by mentioning Central Market's name. 

Our Thanksgiving get-together was a very nice affair at the home of my in-laws.  For age and health reasons they don't travel well, so we all go to them and have our traditional meal there.  

I say "traditional", but honestly, over the years we've slowly integrated many store-bought food items into our feast.  First it was a pie or two, then a "dip sampler" tray, followed by (occasionally) a Honey Baked Ham.

I think 2013 was the year everyone just threw in the towel and said, "everything online, baby!"  Mr & Mrs M ordered a very good smoked turkey and a side dish, K's sis brought more side dishes and some sort of an apple bundt cake dessert, while we brought from Central Market one of their afore mentioned dip samplers, a sweet potato casserole, 2 varieties of dressing (what you people the other side of the Mason/Dixon line call "stuffing"), and a chess pie.

It was all very good, with one glaring exception:  the dish labeled "old fashioned cornbread dressing", traditionally my favorite side dish of them all.  For starters, there are no kernels corn in old fashioned cornbread dressing, or chunks of some unidentifiable red stuff.  Or croutons.  Or leaves.  Everyone tasted it, kind of gave up a sick smile, but did in the interest of politeness refrain from slipping it into their napkin.

I'm thinking, when the Central Market manager told their chef to make a big batch of "old fashioned cornbread dressing", he should have made sure the chef was from this side of one of those big ponds that separates us from those who eat....umm....THAT stuff.  Having a working knowledge of what cornbread consists of would be a definite plus, too.  

All things considered, it was a wonderful meal and a great time with her family, but next year, I'M in charge of acquiring the cornbread dressing.  :)

Lesson learned....when something is labeled "old fashioned", "home cooked", or "just like mom used to make"....RUN!  Run fast, run far.  Those seem to be the code words for "we don't have a clue."

S

Another day in paradise

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Regardless of your circumstances, I hope you can take a few minutes today and give thanks for all that you do have.  If your health isn't the best, just remember there are many hurting more than you.  If your pantry isn't exactly overflowing, remember there are many getting by on less.  If your roof leaks, just remember there are many whose homes have been washed away.  If your finances aren't on the most solid ground, just remember there are many who would happily trade places with you.

Just open your eyes and look around.  We all have much to be thankful for.  We just need to look for it.

Have a wonderful day,

S

"Reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated." Mark Twain

I feel like the blind double-amputee trying to read braille with hooks.*  There's no telling how this post is going to turn out as I can type while only seeing out of the tiny sliver of my eye that isn't covered by a bandage.  

I thought I'd have a little incision and a few stitches covered by a band aid.  Hahaha!  If it's true chicks like guys with scars, then I'll soon be Hollywood's hottest leading man.  They cut me from above my eyebrow, down the side of my nose all the way to my nostril.  At least that's what I'm told.  Fortunately it doesn't hurt.

My next project is to contrive a manly story to explain the scar I'm sure I'll end up with.  "Oh, I was too stupid to wear sunblock and I got skin cancer" is just too pathetic.  I need something like "I was fighting foreign evil-doers intent on destroying our civilization while working side-by-side with my friend Bond, James Bond ('cause he has all the really cool toys). After the mother-of-all-knife-fights we managed to find the device and cut the right wire just as the clock went to 00:00.  You're welcome."

Yeah, that oughta work.

Seriously, K is the ultimate Florence Nightingale.  Before I can even think of something I might want or need she shows up with it.  (It's kinda scary, actually :)  And even little Luke the Wonder Dog sticks right at my side where ever I go.  I guess that's the canine version of TLC.

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Fortunately none of this has damaged my taste buds, which is good because tomorrow promises an absolute feast for which I am truly thankful.  I hope you can have a comfortable day with your friends and family, too. 

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

S

*I realize there are many wounded servicemen and women who will live forever with their injuries where my minor discomfort will only last a few days.  I will always give them all the gratitude and respect I have in me.  I hope you will do the same.  *Thank you*

It's deja vu all over again...again

A little Thanksgiving story from my past:

I love banana pudding....always have, ever since I was a little kid.  My grandmother was an awesome cook, and every Thanksgiving she would make a banana pudding for "us", although I knew it was really for me. Unfortunately, after my grandmother passed on, banana pudding was rare non-existent around our house as my mom didn't inherit her mother's talent for cooking.  

Fast forward a few years.  While my ex-wife was a pretty good an average cook, she wasn't as enamored with banana pudding as I was.  On our first Thanksgiving together we traveled out of town to spend the holiday with her family.  When we got there my new MIL told me she had a surprise for me....she made me a banana pudding.

YEA!  Finally, a banana pudding.  I purposely went easy on the turkey and dressing in order to leave plenty of room in my belly for dessert.  "Mom" dished me up a healthy portion of BP, and I dived in.

*What's with these little chewy bits in my banana pudding?  Coconut.  She put coconut in my banana pudding!  WHY??  Vanilla pudding, bananas, vanilla wafers....that's ALL that goes into banana pudding.  It's a classic, for God's sake!  Don't mess with a sure thing.*

"I saw this new recipe in Southern Living magazine and it sounded soooo good.  I just knew you'd love it."

Mmmmm....thanks "Mom".  *ACK*

Thanksgiving, 2012.  K said she was going to bake something for dessert to take with us to her family's for Turkey Day, and I suggested a pecan pie. 

I love pecan pie....always have, ever since I was a little kid.  Last night K told me she had a surprise for me.  She saw a new recipe on Pintrest she was going to try for "pecan pie....cake".  Cake?  CAKE??  

Ummm, Sweetheart?  Pecan PIE is a classic.  Remember the other Golden Rule?  "If it ain't broke, don't fix it."

I'm sure I'll love it.  

I'm hoping the swelling goes down by Thursday.  ;)

S

What if they threw a party and nobody came?

The Christmas season just gets more and more absurd.  Isn't this (especially) the season where we're supposed to display peace and love for all, just like Jesus did?  Apparently Walmart didn't get that memo.

In their headlong chase for the Almighty Dollar Walmart has decided that Black Friday, that absolutely insane first official day of the Christmas shopping season....the day after Thanksgiving....will now begin at 8 pm ON THANKSGIVING EVENING!  That's when they will open the chutes and let the cattle stampede in.  So much for letting their "valued employees" spend the day with their families.  

I contrast that (here in Dallas at least ) with Weir's Furniture.  They are closed EVERY Sunday.  The Weir family is very religious and they close for that reason, but the bottom line is they allow their employees to spend their Sundays doing whatever they want.  It's their time for family, church, football, picnicking, or whatever.  Here's my point:  people know that if they want to buy a sofa or chair or bedroom furniture from Weir's they'll have to buy it on Saturday or Monday, but NOT on Sunday....and their business hasn't suffered a bit.  If fact, many big-name furniture stores have come and gone in the past 64 years, but Weir's is still here.

I can't think of one thing that will be in Walmart at 8 pm on Thanksgiving Day evening that won't still be there at 7 am on Black Friday morning.  Quit being such dicks, Walmart, and let your people have the day off.  

Rant over.  Now go out there and have a nice weekend.  ;)

S

My Thanksgiving story....

My Mom was, by her own admission, a lousy cook.  Every Thanksgiving, in order to avoid eating her cooking, Dad would buy a large turkey and take it to Moore's Barbecue and they would smoke it for him for a modest price.  My grandmother would make the dressing, and we'd always flatter Mom by telling her what great mashed potatoes she prepared, even though we all knew they were instant potatoes out of a box.  Her speciality was a side dish of celery sticks stuffed with store-bought pimento spread.  Go figure.


One year, for whatever reason, Mom decided she'd try to cook a turkey herself.  Dad still pined for some smoked turkey, so he went out and bought a small turkey breast and took it to Steve Moore for smoking.  (NOTE:  meat shrinks when it's smoked.)  When he went to pick it up the afternoon of Thanksgiving eve, Steve brought out a little foil ball about the size of a baseball and handed it to him.  His small raw turkey breast had cooked down to a bird he could carry home in his coat pocket.


Dad's faced dropped when he saw it, but smiled anyway and asked Steve what he owed him.  Steve just looked at my dad, then looked at the pitiful little bird, and said, "Um...no charge, sir.  Happy Thanksgiving."  Hahaha!


The funniest part was, Mom's turkey dinner turned out to be darn good, and we all enjoyed a fine Thanksgiving meal.  Today I'm sure Mom, Dad, and Grandmother are all sitting at The Big Table enjoying the greatest feast ever, including real mashed potatoes.  I'll be thinking of them.


Happy Thanksgiving to you all, too.


S