No wonder people laugh at France....

....French people talk funny.

Week two of French lessons and it's kicking my argot.  Actually I can read the words and understand what they mean.  I can usually get the gender, tense, etc right, too.  It's when it gives me a verbal sentence to translate that I lose it.  To me it sounds like ellefillegarconcahtnoirettubrutesontsomme when it's said in .003 seconds.  

Hold on there Kemo Sabe....S L O W   D O W N.  "Es" and "est" both sound the same to me when spoken at warp speed.  What happened to the "t" sound?   If France is supposed to be such a laid back place, why do they talk so damn fast? 

I'm thinking about speaking in English and then just wrapping it in a faux-French accent.  Have you ever noticed how all mimes are French?  You know why that is?  Because learning French kicked their argot, too.

Seriously, I'm committed to learning this.  I've always wanted to learn another language.  I'm thinking it will keep my mind....oh look....I Love Lucy is on.

The British on the other hand, despite their outwardly stodgy image, seem to know how to have a good time.

Reading the announcement of the new Royal Baby, Prince Elmo

An English judge

The famous Beefeaters

It looks to me like the whole country is just one giant costume party.

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K is taking a few days off work, so today we're going to visit the new George Dubya Bush Library on the SMU campus in Dallas.  Photos to follow.

Have a good day everyone.  Stay cool.

S

Today's silliness...

Former Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher was laid to rest today in a pomp-filled ceremony in London.  Years ago she was in Dallas on a book-signing tour and I got to meet her.  She had on her finest British properness (is that even a word?), just as I imagined she would.  But I digress.

As I mentioned, today was Margaret Thatcher's funeral.  This photo was on the morning news pages, and I was struck by the ceremonial dress of the Honour Guard.  I wonder where they get those helmets with the built-in lightning rods and feathers?  And those boots?  Harrods?

Nobody does pomp like the British.  If you've never seen the Changing of the Guard ceremony at Buckingham Palace, you've missed something quite spectacular.  I have no idea what the purpose of it all is, with the cavalry and bands and such, but I liked it. Maybe it was just for the benefit of us tourists.

By contrast American military dress uniforms are just so....blah.  Dignified, but blah.  Some militaries just know how to please a crowd, you know?  For example....

....the Swiss Guard that protects the Vatican.  If there's ever trouble in St. Peter's Square, just imagine a few hundred of these guys counter attacking with their red-plumed helmets, court jester costumes, and assault rifles.  Grrrr!  (They need to cull that tall guy in the middle.  He ruins the chorus line.)

I'd have to give the Indian's a B-.  They've got the Las Vegas show-girl headdress down, but IMO they need a bit more panache with the rest of their outfit.  (Read:  Lose the brown.)

It's good be Leader, at least until your subjects behead you.  Remember Libya's Muammar Gaddafi?  Snappy dresser he was.

Here's something I'll bet you haven't seen in the Western press.....the North Korean Army Terror-ette's Drill Team.  Step, kick, step, step kick!

And then there's the Greek army.  Laugh if you want, but I think they'd make a very effective fighting force.  I mean, if I saw a division of these guys charging me with their chiffon shirts, tights, and petticoats, not to mention those cute little puffy balls on their shoes,  I'd run like hell.

I'm sorry, but I have to say my US of A needs to up their game.  Whenever we get our financial house back in order I think we need to bring in a designer to give our troops more flamboyant uniforms.  

Maybe they could make it a TV reality show where we could call in and vote for our favorite.  It's the American way.  ;)

S

Maybe I've been too hard on the French

Ever since The Great War it's been pretty easy....fashionable even....to poke fun at the French.  Example:

TV NEWS:  "Today it was announced that the French will be sending a battalion of troops to join the coalition fighting the Taliban in Afghanistan."

ME:  "Umm....could they just donate a hundred bucks instead?"

But today I read that a "Parisian archive" (whatever that is) has brought in four of these rather shaggy looking sheep to eat the grass on the grounds of the archive (whatever that is).  They're obviously trying to go Green and mothball their lawn mowers, letting the sheep graze to their heart's content instead.

Bravo Parisian archive!  (Whatever that is.)  Credit where credit is due.

Homeowners of America....UNITE!  Let's follow the lead of this innovative Parisian archive (whatever that is) and ditch our lawnmowers.  Just think how much more pleasant our weekends would be if we just left the lawn mowing to the sheep?  And the fertilizing, too.  Screw the HOA!  They want Green?  Let's give 'em Green!

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OK, one last dig at the French. (Old habits die hard.)

It seems that back during one of the many Anglo-French Wars the French captured a British officer.  During his interrogation the French asked him why the British always wore red uniforms?

The British officer explained that if he were to be wounded in battle his blood wouldn't show on his uniform and his men wouldn't become demoralized.

The French realized what a morale-boosting idea this was and that is why, to this very day, French officers wear brown pants.  ;)

Now you know.  Have a great weekend everyone.

S