Finally, a customer service story you'll enjoy

But first....OK, OK, I give.  Apparently there are more of you oddballs out there who read the dribble I normally write about than I figured.  I'll continue to serve as your insomnia medication.

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I think we've all experienced it:  You have a problem with your computer, iThing, washing machine....whatever....so you call customer service.  You're invariably connected to a guy in a land far, far away who speaks some version of English @ 100 mph, and sounds like he has his 'nads caught in a vise.  An hour later you're no better off than when you first called.  Grrr!

Yesterday I did something I'd never done before.  I called my insurance company's Roadside Assistance hotline.  I was a mile from home when I felt something wrong with my car's steering, indicating a flat tire.  

Simple enough....I pulled into a parking lot and started to change it.  I got the jack positioned and up a few notches, then went to get the lug wrench.  It wouldn't fit the lug nuts.  HUH?

I was dead in the water.  I called K at work (a mile away) and asked her to bring me her lug wrench, hoping against hope it would work.  No luck.  *sigh*

One ring later:  "Thank you for calling USAA's Roadside Assistance.  With your permission we can pinpoint your location through your cell phone.  Is that OK?"

ME:  "Uh...sure."

Two seconds later:  "What is your USAA member number, please?"

ME:  "1234567."

Ten seconds later:  "I see you're covered, so there will be no charge to you.  We have your location pinpointed, we've already called service, and they will be there within the hour.  Please just stay with your car."

Fifteen minutes later:  "The Guy" showed up and had me rolling away five minutes later.  (I would have spent more time than that just cussing.)

Then, before I could even get out of the parking lot I received a call from USAA saying they showed my car was fixed.  "Was everything handled to your satisfaction?"

SWEET!  :)

My testimonial:  USAA is the best insurance company EVER!  (Years ago when she lived in a small town in the frozen north K had a wreck one night, and early the next morning the USAA adjuster called to say he was already in town and wanted to know where he could see the car.  He totaled it, and in record time had her a check that exceeded her expectations, no arguing.)

And for what it's worth, USAA is my bank, too.  All check deposits are handled by their cell phone app, and if I ever need to deposit cash (the bank is 300 miles away in San Antonio, TX) I can go to any UPS store and deposit the cash with them and have it credited instantly to my account.  

They don't have ATM machines so I can use any bank ATM anywhere and agree to pay the sponsoring bank's fees, and USAA will reimburse me those fees.  All my bill paying is done through them electronically, a service offered for free.  In fact, I pay no fees for anything!

For once, kudos for GOOD customer service.  Thanks USAA.  :)

S

Customer Service....RIP

"Our Director of Customer Service is Helen Wait.  If you want customer service, go to Helen Wait."

Is anyone reading this old enough to remember newspaper boys?

They were usually elementary or jr. high age kids who would make their delivery rounds by bicycle early in the morning before school started.  Part of their job was to deliver the paper TO YOUR PORCH.  Anything less would usually result in a call to the newspaper, who would dispatch the kid back out to knock on your door and hand you your paper, along with an apology.

Later, for whatever reason, the rules were changed.  I guess the kids' work ethic was beginning to slip, so the newspapers gave the kids plastic baggies and told them to bag the papers and just try to hit the front yard.  

Later still, I suppose they couldn't get enough kids to do the job so they recruited adults who had cars to cover larger areas of town.  They would drive down the street at 40 mph and just sling papers out the window.  If it landed anywhere at all on the property it was considered a successful delivery.

IMO today we've hit absolute bottom.  One of the (print) papers I like to read is the Sunday NY Times.  It's printed locally by the Dallas Morning News and distributed by their crack crew of delivery specialists crack heads.  At least every other week....sometimes several weeks in a row....we have to call the paper and remind them who we are, where we live, that we are one of their "valued" customers, and that we want our paper!

I'm surprised they don't just tell us to come on by and pick one up, or better yet, just go on-line and read it there (which is what I do M-Sat) and quit callin' and wakin' em up.  "Paying customers are just so darn demanding these days...sheesh!"

Listen up Amazon, REI, LL Bean, and those handful of others who still have excellent customer service:  Don't let your people mingle with the general public.  Filter the air in your buildings and boil all water before use.  Offer all available immunizations against this insipid "give-a-shit" disease that is devouring customer service across our land.  Your reputation, your very existence even, depends on it!

S