It's International "Talk Like A Pirate" Day

So a pirate walks into a bar and says, "Aargh....gimme a rum."

The bartender says, "Yes sir, coming right up."  But then he notices the pirate has a ships wheel stuck in the front of his pants, sticking out over his belt.

So the bartender says, "Umm, excuse me Mr. Pirate, sir, but did you know you have a ships wheel stuck in the front of your pants?"

The pirate replied, "Aargh....it's drivin' me nuts!"

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Have you wiped your tech-savvy smile off your face yet?  Are you still giddy?  Were you too excited to sleep last night?

Me either.

Apple's long anticipated iOS7 system is finally here.  I think K was the first person in line to update her phone to eye-ohs 7.  She was floating on cloud 9 when she ran in to show it to me.

"Look...look!  Watch this.  The home screen....the background color is changed, and the icons have different designs.  It's SO much more colorful!"

"Yeah, and did you notice I'm wearing a new colored T-shirt?  Slick, huh?"

"Don't be a smart ass.  Check this....when you look in 'my photos', they're arranged BY DATE!"  *orgasmic shudder*

"Gee, you're right.  This is great!  I never realized how miserable I was when all my photos were just lumped in together."

Then she updated my phone with eye-ohs 7, too.

"Hey honey....how do you delete an email?  I swipe it to the right and it's still there."

"Try swiping it to the left."

"But my right thumb only swipes right.  It doesn't do left."

"Then use your left thumb, moron."

"But I'm hopelessly right handed.  My left thumb is sorta like my appendix....it just hangs there."

"It'll learn.  Maybe you can send it to one of those 'boot camps'."

I should Google that.

S

Is it Apple or Ipple?

I see that Apple is announcing a new upgrade to it's operating system, iOS7.  I know geeks everywhere are in a near orgasmic state over this news, but the Perpetual Neanderthal (me) is not impressed.  I'm just getting used to how my Apple devices work (yeah, I'm  a slow learner) and now they're gonna change them?  *sigh*  As long as they don't mess with its intuitiveness I'll be OK.

Question of the day:  Why does Apple call all their stuff "i"?  It's Apple, not Ipple.

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The scandal around the NSA contractor who revealed the gubment was doing across-the-board phone and internet surveillance on us keeps growing.  I must admit I'm pretty conflicted about it.  On the one hand I want the Federales to keep a close eye on potential terrorists living among us, but it seems to me they're casting much too broad a dragnet.

Did you know there are over 800,000 civilians (contractors) who have the top-secret clearance to see this sort of stuff?  This fella Snowden said he had it within his scope of authority to listen in or read anyone's email.  This is the exact opposite what gubment officials are telling us. 

Think about it.  Do you really believe none of the 800,000 snoops on the payroll wouldn't be even a little tempted to listen in to an old girlfriend's conversation, or what was being emailed back and forth between Brad and Angelina?  I can't imagine 800,000 people, or even 800 people, who would be that disciplined.

I'm afraid I have to agree with those who say our government has overstepped propriety.  I say there needs to be at least some connection between a possible national security threat and invasive snooping.

Opposing views welcome.

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This reminds me of a story a friend told me from back in his days as a marketing rep for a company that sold high-end communications equipment, the kind used on government aircraft for secure communications.  

He was in Bulgaria (?) to bid on a system for their executive aircraft.  He called HQ one evening from his hotel room to let them know how negotiations were going.  He commented, "I really don't think we have a chance.  These guys have close ties with other former eastern European allies and will probably choose one of their companies."

The next day at breakfast a Bulgarian negotiator stepped up to my friend and very stiffly announced, "I want you to know that you do have a fair chance to get this contract, and that we will not necessarily choose a company from one of our former eastern European allies."

Haha!  Busted!

S