As I've written about in the past, I do all our household grocery shopping. Being (sorta) retired I have the time, and frankly I don't mind doing it. When K grocery shops she just wanders around scratching whatever itches. There's no telling what she'll come home with. I go with a list, and I come back with only those things on the list. :)
I was doing pretty well yesterday until I came to the cereal aisle. That's where K had requested "normal brand granola". As opposed to what? Abnormal brand granola? I don't remember ever buying any granola before.
On the 50-yard-long cereal aisle I finally found granola. Oh Crap! Nature Valley Granola, Wild Roots Granola, Pure Fit, Bear Naked, Cascadia, Go Raw, Heartland, Kashi....on and on.
Ring....ring....
K: Yo. Sup?
ME: Which brand granola do you want?
K: I liked what you bought last time.
ME: Whatdayamean "last time"? I don't remember a last time. Was it in a bag or a box?
K: A smallish box, I think.
ME: Small-ish? I'll need more than that.
K: Get the one with raisins in it.
I couldn't find one with raisins. I found one with dried up little blueberries, though. She eats breakfast before the sun comes up, and she's usually half asleep....they're both sorta purple/blue....I wonder if she'll know the difference?
Nah, better not. With my luck....
Ring....ring....
K: Yo. Sup?
ME: No raisins. What's plan B?
K: Just get something you'll like in case I don't.
ME: Umm....no. I'm not strapping on a feed bag. No sirree.
(I bought Nature Valley Oats 'n Honey. We'll see tomorrow if I'm a hero or a goat.)
Towards the end of the list she asked for "face wash, see text msg for photo"
Cool! This oughta be a slam dunk!
So I found the soap aisle, and it was Oh Crap! time again. I found the Neutrogena section....they had body bars, body wash, body scrub, body gel, green tea flavor, pink grapefruit flavor.... *gimme a break*
Then I remembered they had a lotion section a few aisles over. Maybe it was there.
Ha! Dream on. I finally showed an "associate" my picture and she said, in heavily accented jive, "That's over in faces."
WTF does that mean?
Turns out they have a whole section of stuff just to clean faces. They had Neutrogena facial mask, rapid wrinkle repair, fresh foaming cleaner, makeup remover, daily cleaner, hydrating cleaner....
With a look on my face like a little whipped puppy, a lady with really big hair (hereafter known as Edna) saw my despair and took pity on me ...."What's a matter Sugar?"
I showed her the picture of the stuff I was looking for and she said, "Here ya go Sweetie. Purifying facial cleaner."
For the record, it was the last bottle left, and it was at about mid-shin shelf height. (I only buy stuff above waist height. I have yet to find anything at a grocery store that's worth me bending over for.) If it wasn't for Edna I'd still be looking. *thanks E*
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I'm so glad I'm a man. Cheerios. Irish Spring top to bottom. Maybe some of that anti-chafing stuff in the summer. Life is good.
Happy weekend everyone. :)
S
