Public Enemy No. 1....yep, that's me!

Last week K bought a new, comfy upholstered chair.  One afternoon I was sitting in my chair reading and out of the corner of my eye I saw one of those little white tags showing underneath her new ottoman.  You know, the ones that certify that the stuffing in the chair meets all fire safety standards, etc, then goes on to say "DO NOT REMOVE UNDER PENALTY OF LAW".

Being just slightly OCD I couldn't read for looking at that damn label.  It was just taunting me, I swear.  I couldn't help my bad self....I flipped the ottoman over, whipped out my trusty pocket knife, and cut it off.

Within seconds there was a rather forceful knock at my door.  I thought, "Holy crap!  There really IS a Label Police!"  Should I try and make a run for it?  Plea bargain?  Is it true I only get one phone call?  So who should it be to?  K?  A lawyer?  My 63 year clean record, pffffft...gone...over a label!  DOH!

I had visions of being Bubba's girlfriend in The Big House.

Turns out it was just the UPS guy.  *whew*

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True....ridiculous, but true:  The European Union has a rule, EC2257/94, that regulates the allowable curvature of elongated produce such as bananas and cucumbers.  It says that to be graded Class 1 it must be "practically straight and bent by no more than a gradient of 1/10."  

So is there a Banana/Cucumber Police that goes from farmers market to farmers market looking for bent produce?  Do they have Department of Bananas specialists and  Department of Cucumbers specialists?

Do they have special identifying uniforms?

Is this all they have to do in Europe....put people on the government payroll to go around policing rules like EC2257/94?   

Bureaucracy at its finest.  I wonder if they got the idea from our Label Police or if we got ours from their Banana/Cucumber Police?  Either way I can't believe such rules exist for me to write about in a blog post.  

What a waste of time.  I'm pretty sure consumers can figure out that a banana that's tied in a knot isn't something they want to buy for their families.

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Speaking of a waste of time:  You've heard about the law passed by the Arizona Legislature that allows service to be denied to gays by those who are offended by homosexuality on religious grounds?  Why are they even bothering with such a law?

If the Governor signs it someone will simply trot across the street to the Federal Courthouse where a Federal Judge will immediately issue a restraining order and shortly thereafter declare it unconstitutional.  Duh!  Talk about chasing a windmill.

Is this what happens when politicians stop taking their medicine?

S

"I didn't do it, it wasn't my fault, I can fix it...."

So everybody is asking, "Why can't the government put together a health care website that works?"  Well, here's one little fact that I'll bet you haven't heard before:

When the government awards a contract to develop something like the HealthCare.gov website they must follow a code called the Federal Acquisition Regulation, which is more than 1,800 pages of legalese.  It all but assures the companies that win the contracts are the ones that can navigate the REGULATIONS the best, NOT the ones who can necessarily do the best job.  In other words, the winning companies have the best lawyers, not necessarily the best techies.

Consider this:  94% of Federal information technology projects in the past 10 years have been delayed, over budget, or performed below expectations....41.4% FAILED COMPLETELY!

IMO bureaucrats rarely do anything well, unless you consider writing endless reams of regulations that do little more than give themselves job security.  At that they're friggin' World Champions!  Nothing that can't be fixed, however.  :)

The men are excited about getting to shoot a bureaucrat. You wouldn't happen to be a lawyer, too, would you?

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I will have to give a reprieve, however, to the Justice Department team that nailed JP Morgan Chase with a $13 BILLION settlement relating to their fraudulent mortgage bundling scam.  And Chase was told they might still be liable for CRIMINAL prosecution, too.  Looks like the pressure being put on the DoJ to not let these formerly "too big to jail" white-collar smug thugs get away with their crime is gaining traction.

Now I understand Bank of America is next in the Fed's gunsight.  I'd love to be a fly on the interrogation room wall as the bankers line up to squeal on each other and try to get themselves a deal.  

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Looks like a fun weekend ahead:  A big Northampton / Saracen rugby match tomorrow am, Texas Tech vs Oklahoma pm, and some sort of food / music / car show event in downtown Plano in between.  And maybe some rain over the weekend, too, which would be welcome.

Hope y'all have a fun weekend planned, too.  ;)

S

"Hi, I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you."

K seems to think that because I've blogged on the public broadband that our leaders are crooks and their underlings are overpaid, lazy bureaucrats with BO I probably have a sizable dossier somewhere in the NSA archives.

Gee....I hope they spelled my name right.  *That's SCOTT, with two "T"s*

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Would you buy a used car from this man?

It seems the Junior Embarrassment from my home state of Texas, US Senator Rafael Edward (Ted) Cruz, has renounced half of his dual citizenship (born in Canada to an American mother and a Cuban father).  Rumors are this was done in order to pave the way for a 2016 run for the Presidency.  Of the United States of America.  Yes, I know!

I guess Canada's loss is....well....Canada's gain, too.

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Just got the news....we're moving again.  A nicer, larger apartment with a balcony/view here in our building has opened up, and we were first in line.

One question:  Does anyone have any experience with AT&T U-Verse internet/cable TV?  We have Time Warner now, but with their ongoing fight with CBS, and with football season rapidly approaching, I'm thinking this might be the time to tell TW adios.  (You don't mess with a man's telecast football games!)

Good day everyone.  :)

S

Symbolism vs. Reality

Bureaucrats and politicians and much of civilized society, too, believe in rules and laws.  If there's a problem, you pass a law or amend a rule and the problem is fixed.  Sometimes that works, often times not.  It looks like our leaders will soon be writing new laws to deal with gun violence in the wake of the Connecticut school shootings.  So will these new laws represent a paradigm shift in public safety or just be a symbolic gesture?

I expect to see new gun laws that will prohibit the purchase of some types of high-powered firearms and expand the databases that decide who can buy a gun and who can't.  It's a noble gesture, something the public will welcome as it will make them feel they're doing something to relieve the pain we all feel when we think of those innocent children lost at Sandy Hook.

I expect to see school districts everywhere amend their school visitor rules, requiring more identification and explanation of intent before doors will be unlocked for them.

Good people will comply with these new gun purchase rules and will always knock politely and ask for permission to enter.  Evil people will still buy their guns on the streets or just steal them and kick in whatever door is in their way.  This is reality.  

Keeping some types of guns off the streets isn't a bad thing at all, but with between 250M and 350M privately owned firearms out there right now it would be like assessing every adult another $1.50 in taxes and expecting that to balance our budget.  This is little more than symbolism.

Let's get real.  We have many mentally disturbed people living among us.  Some slowly go over the edge or just eventually snap and do terrible things.  These are the people we need to reach out to.  We need to identify them and do something....really DO something....to help them.  Right now any programs to help them are being increasingly starved for money.  They're just pushed to the side by society.

In exchange for help they would have to give up their right to own weapons, and would be subject to frequent random inspection of their residences and belongings to confirm they remain unarmed.  Anything we could do to assist them would no doubt be appreciated by them and even more so by their families who are desperate for help, and would make us all safer, too.  Not just feel safer, but actually be safer.  Win / win. 

If we won't even honor "Thou shall not kill", what chance does another photo-op bill signing in Washington DC have?

S

Things that really chap my hide....

Passwords.  Hate 'em!  

I've written about this before, but nothing has changed and they're still chapping my hide.  Typical security question:  "What was the name of your first elementary school?"  xxxxxxxx

"Incorrect.  What was the name of your first elementary school?"  Hmmm....maybe it's case sensitive?  Xxxxxxxx

"Incorrect.  What was the name of your first elementary school?"  Listen up, dammit.  I went there for six friggin' years.  I KNOW what the name of my school was.  It's xxxxxxxx.

"Incorrect.  You are now locked out.  You must jump through 6 incredibly difficult hoops in order to regain access.  Get ready to give blood and have your DNA tested.  Oh, and bend over."

Grrrrrr!

But there is hope.  Yesterday I heard that some nerdy inventor, apparently just as fed up with passwords as me, will soon release a new program/app that uses "biometrics" (retinal scan?) to determine the legitimacy of a user.  You look into the camera on your computer (or iPhone?) and it can tell if you are really "you".  

I could be the face of this product....the poor Goober who never can remember all his many passwords. I doubt I'm alone on this.

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Bureaucrats.  I think they're profiling me.

When building a new home we have to provide to the city building inspection department a "form and elevation survey".  This confirms that the home is not being built outside the allowable building pad (not too close to the side or front or rear property lines).  It's also to confirm that we are at least at  the required minimum elevation above sea level (to make sure we're not in a flood plain).

I turned mine in on the project we have underway now and two days later they kicked it back.  The subdivision plat they have on file shows one side property line to be be 164.22 feet long.

My surveyor found it to actually be 164.23 feet long....one one-hundredth of a foot longer.  That's about 1/8" difference. Big Whoop!  It made absolutely no difference in whether the home was properly within the pad.  We had plenty of space to spare all around.  

I had to call my surveyor and have them redo it to show the .22, all because some bureaucrat didn't have enough sense (or the authority) to make the call.  Grrrrr!

For the record I appreciate legitimate building inspections.  I know first hand that there are plenty of builders who stay up late thinking of ways they can cut corners to make a few more $$$$, quality be damned.  Inspectors need to hold their ground.  What I described here, however, just borders on harassment.

S

The Dumpster Police

I'm not sure if there is an actual "First Rule of Bureaucracy", but if there is I'm sure it's something like, "Job security is directly proportional to the number of stupid new rules you can dream up."

We started another new custom home last week.  We're to the point now of putting up the perimeter silt fence (to please the Federal bureaucrats at the EPA*) and bringing in the trash dumpster.  Now we find that we must have yet another permit, this time to bring a dumpster onto our property, something we've been doing for years.

It seems this large Dallas-area suburb now wants us to declare what's going in the dumpster.

Me:  "Uhh....trash, Sir!"

City Dumpster Police:  "What kind of trash?"

Me:  "Construction trash, Sir!"

City Dumpster Police:  "Specifically, what kind of 'construction trash'?"

I'm so tempted to say, "Scrap lumber, plywood, roofing, cardboard boxes, Jimmy Hoffa's body, leaking barrels of toxic DDT, old bloody wound dressings from the illegal AIDS clinic next door....you know....the usual."

*Speaking of the parasites in Washington, did you know I have to pay a 3rd party inspector to come and check our "storm water runoff mitigation compliance" twice every month and within 24 hours of every 1/2" rain, at a cost of $75 per visit?  (You can "self inspect", but they'll hang you if you're audited.)

This adds about $1,500 to the cost of every home I build, yet another example of why homes cost so much.  IMO we have way too many people doing similar unproductive tasks that add absolutely nothing to our economy.  They make a living, a very good living I might add, by leaching on to those who actually produce something of value.  

Just sayin'.

S

We pay HOW MUCH? For WHAT?

All I hear on the news these days is the deadlock over budget reform / raising the debt limit.  What I want to know is where exactly does our tax money go?  I'm sure with enough time and research abilities anyone could comb through the federal budget and find out, but really, no one I know has that much spare time.  I would love for someone to tell me in plain English what all is included in the budget for the Agriculture Department, for example.  How much is paid out in subsidies to well-connected "gentleman farmers" and mega-agra-corporations to NOT grow certain crops?  Name names, give me dollar amounts.


We know what the bottom-line is for the State Department budget, but specifically, how is that money spent?  Who do we give foreign aid to?  A complete list, please.  (I see that as of this past weekend we have another new country in the world, South Sudan.  How much is THAT going to cost us?)


I'd love to know how much tax breaks to oil companies and banks cost us, and big pharma and big-insurance, too.  And I'd love to know the thousands of little-known programs we fund.  I'll bet that would be a REAL eye-opener!  (I once served on a city commission with a lady, a federal bureaucrat, who told me her job was to coordinate federal programs that seek to promote a healthy family life for American Indians.  HUH?  How much?  $50M?  $100M? More?)


My point is I don't think they (the bureaucrats and their masters, Congress) want us to know....too many favors being handed out to too many cronies.


I say off with ALL their worthless heads.


S

One issue resolved, and another pops up....

Yesterday's situation (see previous post) with the obstinate building inspector has been resolved.  He reviewed the info I brought him and agreed I was doing things per code.  He did want one more bit of documentation, which he admitted was a simple CYA (Cover Your Ass) exercise on his part.  It just never ends!  This is why I have so little use for bureaucrats.... except those whose names start with "D" and end in "orrie".  *wink*


Seriously, when I hear city managers whining about budget shortfalls, and how are they ever going to make ends meet, boohoohoo, I have very little sympathy for them.  I honestly believe we could reduce the size of government by 25% or more and not miss a beat, that's how much dead wood there is.

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Now my new, more personal issue:  Last week our apartment management sent crews around to enter our apartments and change our smoke detector batteries.  (Told ya I don't lift a finger here :)  When K came home mid-afternoon for her lunch and to let the dog out she found the dog IN THE BATHTUB! That was apparently their way of getting her out of their way.  How long was she there?...10 minutes?...3 hours? Why did they leave her in there when they were through?  She went to the office to complain, and when I got home later I went and complained, too.  They promised it would never happen again.


This week they notified us they were sending crews around to freshen the paint on our exterior doors, and that if we would prefer to be there to call and set up an appointment.  Remembering the stink from the week before, I made an appointment for 4 PM today.  I got home well before 4 and our housekeeper told me some maintenance guy just let himself in an hour earlier and she shooed him away.  


Back to the office I went to complain.  "Does an appointment mean nothing to you people?  I can't lock my dog up...she doesn't even have a crate.  That's why I prefer to be there."  Then the manager told me she confronted the employee  involved in the dog-in-the-bathtub incident (borrowed from a sister complex elsewhere), and he denied everything.  I told her HE LIED, that my dog literally could not jump into a bathtub.  She's too old and too small.


I will not tolerate a liar.  No more Mr. Nice Guy here.  I'm writing to the parent company and complaining, and if he gets fired, then my position is he fired himself by his actions and his lying.


Rant over.


S

Today I was the "Bug"

You've heard the old saying,"Some days you're the windshield, some days you're the bug"?  Today was my day to get squished like a bug on life's windshield.  


I swear I work with idiots difficult people. And these are people in authority, as in "building inspectors".  Today I had a polite row with an inspector, a SENIOR inspector at that, who is now back acting as a field inspector, instead of an office-paper-pusher-bureaucrat / inspector.  He admitted he hasn't inspected anything in years, but insisted he was right on a technical issue...we'll leave it at that.  But he's wrong.  Dead wrong!


I've spent half a day (and remember..."time is money") researching the matter, and I now have documentation my position is correct.  Tomorrow morning I'm going to City Hall to see Mr. Inspector and go over it with him.  It's pretty technical, so I hope he's up to speed and can comprehend the data.  If he does, and will admit my position is allowed per code, life goes on.  (I'm certainly NOT going to gloat and say "I told you so.")  But if he is too proud to admit it and won't back down, or if he just doesn't "get it", then I'm in a quandary.


I can surrender and do what he asks, which will cost me several thousand dollars, or I can go over his head and fight him and probably win, but at what cost?  "Win the battle, lose the war."


Grrrrr!  I hate Mondays.


S