Wednesday, July 24, 2013

But wait. There's more. Call now and I'll DOUBLE the offer!

I'm gonna be rich!  This is a slam dunk, can't miss deal.  It's a noise cancelling device that will bring, to paraphrase Neville Chamberlain, peace to our time.  EVERYONE will want one of these.  OK, are you ready?  Here it is:


Here's how it works:  Whenever there is a aural-borne irritant in your life, such as barking from a stray household pet or a screaming child or just a loud-mouth neighbor, simply aim the yellow nozzle at them, squeeze the blue trigger, and Waa-Laa, quiet!

And it uses no harsh toxic chemicals....it actually runs on plain H2O.  That's right, water!  I have personally Beta tested it on Luke The Wonderdog just this morning and the results were outstanding!  

I can't wait to travel on an airplane again.  That irritating little creature sitting right behind you screaming something about his ears hurting....just one spritz and you can sit back and doze off for the rest of the flight.

I can see a huge market with the clergy, too.  Imagine Sunday service.  The sanctuary is packed.  You're preaching one helluva fire and brimstone sermon, and....Waaaaaaaa....Waaaaaaa.  Simply identify the culprit, adjust the nozzle for long range accuracy, and Pffffffttt!  Quiet.

How about in movie theatres?  The plot is getting intense, you're on the edge of your seat, and ring....ring....hello?  Squiiiirt.  With a little practice you'll be able to not only hit 'em up side the head, but short out their phone, too.

The possibilities are endless.  Look for the all new, Scott's Super Noise Cancelling Peacemaker in stores near you, coming this Fall.  :)

S



9 comments:

  1. brilliant! we're gonna be rich!

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  2. Hmmm...there might be a few kinks to be worked out.

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  3. I don't want to wait until Fall. I want one NOW!

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  4. I used a picture of my cat as a label on the beta model I was testing.
    The title was "Bad cat!" I endorse the concept 100% after extensive field testing on my kitchen counter tops. Rock on!

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    Replies
    1. Obviously you're a man of intense ingenuity. Kudos to you, Sir. ;)

      And thanks for stopping by. I'll drop in on your blog, too.

      S

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  5. Can I have a mini one to keep in my purse?

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  6. I want mine with a rain coat, in case I sit near you on an airplane! ;-)

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