Saturday, July 20, 2013

Careful what you pray for


I think I've figured out why the weather this summer is so hot:  During last winter's never-ending blizzard all you Yankees got down on your knees at the same time and said, "Dear God, PLEEEEEEEZE make this snow stop and give us some heat."  And hearing it from all sides He said, "OK, done."  Uh Huh....that was it.

There are some things that you can just count on.  Every spring the grass greens up and the trees bloom.  The track of the sun moves a little closer to the equator, and the temperature gets warmer miserably hot.  And I write a blog post bitching about the grass getting greener and needing mowing, the trees blooming and making me sneeze, and the sun track moving toward the equator making it miserably hot. 

Summertime as a school-age kid was fun, for obvious reason....school was out for 3 months.  WooHoo!  Even tempered by the fact that I was charged with mowing our lawn, summer was still a fun time.  

Now as an adult, however, I see absolutely NO redeeming social value whatsoever to summer.  Working/playing outside in the summer makes us HOT.  When we get hot we SWEAT.  When we sweat we STINK.  So basically we just walk around STINKING up the place for 3 months.  Why would anyone want to do that?  I'm pretty sure "summer" is an old Indian word for "stink".  

The only excuse I can figure for there even being a summer at all is because God must have wanted to make it up to you Yankees for sticking you way up north like that with all those blizzards.  "Oops, sorry guys.  To make it up to you I'll give you a few months of warmth, OK?  We good?"  But then He realized that was burning all us southerners to a crisp, so He gave us air conditioning....and ice cream with fresh strawberries on top. ;) 

*Sigh*  Oh well, I guess it's all part of The Plan.  Enjoy your Saturday, and stay cool.

S


10 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. One would actually be welcome here anytime now through September. Bring it.

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  2. Ooh I want ice cream with strawberries on top! Better roust Mike & head out!

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    1. Must have been a record strawberry crop this year Dana. They're plentiful and cheap. And DELICIOUS, too. ;)

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  3. You seem to have God all figured out. When you have a free moment I have a few God-related questions to ask you. Take care and have a great weekend.

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    1. Steve, just have a few scotch's and ask Him yourself. ;)

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  4. We have people like you here in Florida. We call them "snow birds."

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  5. Heat? You don't know nothin' 'bout no heat, boy! What we'uns got over here in Arizona is HEAT! What you poor Tex-uns got is HOOMIDITY!

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    1. But I don't want HOOMIDITY! Make it go away.

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