Wednesday, January 23, 2013

!! BREAKING NEWS !!

Kidding....this must be the most boring news day ever.  Did Beyonce lip-sync the Star Spangled Banner at O'Bama's inauguration?  Why would anyone care?

Michelle O'Bama rolled her eyes at something John "Boner" Boehner said at lunch.  The big deal is they won't tell us what he said.  Shouldn't there be some Freedom of Information Act rule that applies here?

Apache helicopter pilot Prince Harry (Capt. Wales if you're curious) is in trouble with the Taliban....shouldn't that be a mark of honor?....for saying popping terrorists is like playing a video game.  Take note Xbox....I've found your next celebrity spokesman.

All the world's big-name bankers are assembled in Davos, Switzerland trying to tell us they're really good guys and asking us to pleeeeease not regulate them any more.  Now that's an uphill PR battle.  "Listen to what I say, just don't watch what I do."  

One of the Williams sisters lost her match and destroyed her tennis racket in frustration.  Like that's never happened before.  Next they're gonna tell us some golfer got pissed and threw his clubs in the lake.

Hold the presses:  The AP headline reads "Foes of NYC Soda Size Limit Doubt Racial Fairness".  Huh?  

Airlines still have all their Boeing 787's parked due to the plane's insistence on smoking in the lavatory, and in the cockpit, and in the cargo hold, and in the avionics bay....



To try and make a few bucks off of them while they're just sitting there smoldering, how about this:  Open them up as kid's playgrounds.  I mean, are those cool slides or what?  :)

And finally, it's been leaked that this year's Super Bowl XLVII will be heavy with beer, car, and cola commercials.  Unlike the other XLVI Super Bowls that came before it. 

Y'all behave.

S



8 comments:

  1. I can't wait for the Captain Wales flight simulator game to come out.

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    1. Christmas will be here before you know it! :)

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  2. Captain Wales and his buddies in arms would do better and stay safer if Captain Wales learned how to keep his mouth shut.

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  3. Talk about a slow news day! When rolling eyes makes the evening news? Great idea about the Jet planes, those are great looking slides indeed.

    You should do a daily news recap...at least on slow news days.

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  4. If you ever get sick of retirement, you could always sub for Stephen Colbert!

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  5. The 24 news cycle at work. Telling these stories is much easier than exercising real journalism, I guess. I"m almost ready to give up Huff Post, as it's become mostly this kind of story, and even the NYT is not immune to it any longer.

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