"DENMARK: A patient broke wind while having surgery and set fire to his genitals. The 30-year-old man was having a mole removed from his bottom with an electric knife when his attack of flatulence was ignited by a spark. His genitals, which were soaked in surgical spirits, caught fire. The man, who is suing the hospital, said, 'When I woke up, my penis and scrotum were burning like hell. Besides the pain, I can't have sex with my wife.' Surgeons at the hospital in Kjellerups said: 'It was an unfortunate accident.'"
Uh...hello Mrs. Anderssen. We have some good news and some bad news. Your husband's mole is gone. So is his junk.
* I couldn't make this up, but I'm not so sure someone else didn't.