Monday, November 26, 2012

Here's an offer you can't refuse....


Buy any new Park Place Custom Home (that would be ME!) between now and December 20th and if the world does in fact end on December 21st as the Mayan calendar predicts, we'll refund your money!  That's right....a free house!  Call now and ask for Scott.

This was actually a tongue-in-cheek ad by a Dallas area car dealer I saw on TV this morning.  I think it's pretty cute, but I doubt there are too many dullards out there who took it seriously.  There are ads, however, that seem to me to be equally ludicrous but must be super-successful or else they wouldn't pop up over and over.

How about the car dealer who promises "$3,000 trade-in for your old car, regardless of it's condition!  Push it in, tow it in...we don't care."  Ummm....$3,000 off what price?  Obviously (to me) it would be the MSRP of the overpriced new car they're gonna sell you.  And they're lined up around the block.

How about the air conditioning/heating contractor who promises if you'll buy an all-new super-efficient system from him it will save you up to 66% a month on your utility bills.  Up to 66%?  As in "some amount not to exceed" 66%?  Ummm....5% doesn't exceed 66%.  Operators are standing by.

And then there's the TV-only offer of a new super-slicer / super-mop / super-hair-remover (pick one) for only $19.99.  "BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!  Call right now and we'll DOUBLE the offer.  Just pay separate shipping and handling."  Ummm....how much is "shipping and handling"?  (I'm guessing the same amount it costs to import another one from the little toothless, naked sidewalk vendor in Papua-New Guinea.)  Have your credit card ready when you call.

It's true:  There's a sucker born every minute.  Cha-Ching!  (But that offer about the free house is real :)

S


6 comments:

  1. We get $5000 on any car here in NJ! We also get...believe it or not...FREE ESTIMATES!!! I hate having to pay for an estimate. How much for this toaster...about 11 thousand dollars? No thanks..oh...$10 for the estimate...damn!

    Good one Scott!

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  2. My ISP offers me ‘unlimited monthly downloads’ – subject to their own Terms and Conditions. To be fair, I’m unlikely to exceed them, but why don’t they just say what the actual amount is? That is, after all, what matters when comparing ISPs.
    Another old favourite is car adverts where they used to say ‘Best in its class’. What class? They never said. Presumably ‘of the class of cars of which this is the best’. Self-defining terms are the dream of advertisers.

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  3. I always wonder how many trade-ins can I have on the car? Could I round up like 10 junked cars and get a free 30,000 car?

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  4. PT...I'm sure that's forbidden in the fine print somewhere.

    Simon...Rather insulting when you think about it, huh?

    Joe...I'll bet you have a lot of "underwater" trade-in cars in NJ these days, right?

    S

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  5. Whew - I'm finally caught up in the Low & Slow world. It always takes a while when I've been off the grid for a few days...

    I am useless as a savvy customer - I rarely pay attention to ads & even if I TRY to find a bargain somewhere I end up just getting the thing I want no matter how much it is. My mom would be so disappointed in me!

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  6. Mrs. C. is always bringing me these strange ads and I have to explain them to her. She's generally much smarter than I am but she's just not hip to advertising.

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