I was watching the news this morning where they did a recap of Felix Baumgartner's supersonic plunge to earth as he stepped out of a balloon at 128,000 feet. His effort was, of course, sponsored by Red Bull.
Red Bull. I don't get it. It's an "energy drink" that consists mainly of caffeine along with a few other natural ingredients (taurine and glucuronolactone, found in fish, poultry, and grains....I looked it up). That's it. I tried the stuff a couple of times but found it had absolutely NO effect on me. It's a glorified cup of Joe, which by the way doesn't have any effect on me, either.
Austrian entrepreneur Dietrich Mateschitz was traveling through Thailand back in the 80's when he discovered the locally brewed concoction. He partnered with them and grew the brand into the international phenomenon it is today, and made a few billion bucks for himself in the process. Last year Red Bull sold 4.5 BILLION cans at, what....$2-3 each? As I said, I tried it and didn't feel squat. Nada! Well, I felt like my wallet was $2-3 lighter. Does that count? I think they should call it Red Bullshit.
On the other hand, I do like the way they take much of their profits and use it to sponsor everything from F-1 race car teams to airplane races, yacht races, motocross racing, insane skiing, soccer teams, to guys jumping cars and motorcycles through the air for no obvious reason at all. Oh, and so Felix Baumgartner can prove once and for all that Sir Isaac Newton was right. Their list of crazy things to sponsor is almost endless. Good for 'em, I say!
Next I think they need to sponsor me as I attempt a leisurely stroll through a city park while towing a tiny little dog....a sure crowd pleaser if there ever was! For enough cash I'll even wear their logo on a helmet or a cape. That ought to sell another case or two of Red Bull, right? *wonder why nobody thought of this before now?*
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I've never drank any Red Bull. My superhero character goes through a lot of it though; she has a whole minifridge in her Batcave stocked with it.
ReplyDeleteI guess now skydiving is passe. Now if you really want to prove how brave you are, you need to go spacediving! I'm sure before long people will be getting married while going supersonic speeds and all that.
I can not handle more than one cup o joe in the am or I get severe case of the jitters so I am sure i could not handle a red bull. I understand its greatest use is in allowing kids to get drunk faster than without it. Great product. My advise would be don't drink that shit, and don't jump out of a balloon 128 billion feet in the air.
ReplyDeleteI might change my mind if I saw an old fart with a cape walking a tiny dog in the park advertising the stuff.
LOL at Joe - that would be quite a sight. I still wouldn't try any though - we do NOT want me to be any witchier than I already am!
ReplyDeletePause...as I picture you in a red cape.
ReplyDeleteRed Bull? I'll stick to my coffee, thankyouverymuch.
ReplyDelete